Worries about money top the list of stressors, along with other causes including family drama, cooking, being away from family, and working in retail — especially during the holidays. Stress is a constant in our lives and how we deal with it has a lot to do with our health and ability to be successful. I touch more on this fact in my upcoming book Strong Enough: Choosing Courage, Resilience and Triumph.
When you are under stress, the emotional center of your brain (specifically the amygdala) lights up, shooting cortisol and adrenaline through your brain. This was originally intended to help us freeze, run away, or fight an impending attacker. The same process happens when we face an emotional setback or threat. Understanding your reactions to stress in difficult situations is critical. Become aware of how you react to stress by answering these questions:
- How does stress affect you physically (e.g., tightness in chest, sweating, knots in your stomach, headaches, etc.)?
- How does stress affect you psychologically or emotionally (e.g., feeling out of control)?
- How have you learned to de-stress (laughing, meditating, doing yoga, reading, etc.)?
Since our level of Emotional Intelligence has a lot to do with how well we handle stress, I can share my Emotional Intelligence Self-Assessment to identify areas of strength and opportunity. For example, how do you rate yourself on the following?
- When someone disagrees with me, I listen to their point of view (Hint: If the answer is no or rarely, always start a disagreement with “What do you think?” and don’t share your point of view until you understand theirs, Anne says.)
- When I am upset, I find ways to communicate my needs.
- I assess my options, choosing the best alternative under pressure.
- I control any impulses to act too hastily when I’m under pressure.
- I cope with stress in a positive way, examining possibilities.
Your answers to these questions come down to training yourself to be calm and manage your emotions.
