Motherhood can be one of the most stressful jobs in life. Add to it being an entrepreneur, and you have a recipe for being extremely busy, exhausted, stressed out, overworked and overwhelmed.
Motherhood alone asks us to handle the demands of the family that often stretch us beyond what we think we are capable of. When you also have a business to take care of, life can seem like nothing but work, work, and more work.
When you are creating a business, (or have a demanding job), it can seem at times like finding balance or a ‘sweet spot’ between motherhood and business is both totally necessary, and semi-impossible!
What if your life as a mom, as well as your children and family could, contribute to the growth of your business? What if your business could make your whole life easier? What if you could relax in both/all areas of your life, and watch it flourish?
Part of what allows us to do create something so seemingly impossible is to begin to look at what actually works for us – and use that as our guide.
Are you the type of woman who has decided that you have to handle everybody’s problems? Do you have to be there for everybody at all times, no matter what? If this is your point of view, then you will need to be there for your children, your employees, your business, your entire family, and everybody and everything. Chances are, if that is your point of view, you will also put everybody in your life in front of and above you.
When you begin to get clear on what actually works for you, and you begin to have the courage to put that in place as your life, things can change dramatically. Looking at what works for you is a sign of you actually valuing you and your life and your time – which then changes everybody and everything around you.
We train people around us to treat us how we believe we should be treated. If you don’t value you and your time, your children will not either, your employees will not either, your spouse will not either, and so on.
Knowing what works for you can feel like a mountain to climb in and of itself. When you do get clear on what works for you, you can start to institute that in your life in a way that allows your household, your family, and your business to become easier and easier, while you become more relaxed, at ease, and successful.
Here are 3 tips for getting clear on what works for you and putting it into place in your life, no matter what!
1. Let Go of Trying to Get It Right.
What have you decided it is to be a good mom? If you have decided that you have to do everything for everybody in order to be a “good mom,” you are going to get tired and cranky fast! Or, you already are. This can be the greatest cause of stress in your life.
Who decides what a good mom is, anyway? Everybody has a different point of view about that. “Good mom” and “bad mom” are simply judgments. And chances are, if you asked five people, they would come up with very different responses, and nobody would agree. Does that mean that any of them are right? If you give yourself the freedom to discover what is true for you as a mom and for your family, you just might be surprised.
Is being a good mom cooking dinner for your family every night? Is it folding the laundry? Is it keeping your house clean? Perhaps being a good mom is simply being present for your kids and family when they require you? If you are trying to live up to an erroneous standard of “good mom,” you will miss the mark over and over, and you will wear yourself out in the process. The judgment of ourselves and our performance is exhausting and leaves no creative juice for the creation of our businesses and the things that light us up.
2. Make Yourself Useless!
Yes! That is not a mistake! If you are the key ingredient in your family, and if you are the key ingredient in your business, and everybody needs YOU all the time – you can never relax, take a break, or simply let go. Set up your family and your business so that you become more and more useless all the time! While this might seem crazy, if your business can run itself without you there, and your family is self-sufficient, then you can show up to contribute where you are most needed. You may be surprised that the places where you are needed the most in your business and in your family are not what you think. What would you have to change about your business in order to make yourself useless? What would you have to change about your family? Who would you hire, what systems could you create, what jobs and tasks can you delegate and give away to others? If the smooth running of your business and family require you – then you are stuck! If that is not the case, you empower the people in your life to create things on their own and find out that they are far more capable than they may have originally thought.
3. Value You.
Are you a priority in your own life? Do you value your time and energy? Do you realize how much you give to support your family, your business, your employees, and your coworkers? If you do not realize – and value – your contributions, nobody else well. We train people around us to treat us the way that we believe we should be treated. How have you set up your life and how have you ‘trained’ the people around you?
Do all roads lead to you, and do you take the brunt of everything? Have you made everybody a priority in all areas of your life – except for you? If you are not valuable to you, you will not be valuable to anybody else. Take care of your mind and body by engaging in relaxing activities such as yoga. Invest in the best massage chair you can find so you can take a break from the daily tasks. If you value you, and you set up your life and business as a reflection of that, you will be amazed by how people start to treat you. This one shift in our belief systems changes absolutely everything!
What if you could be relaxed, happy, have fun, enjoy, and thoroughly thrive as a mom, entrepreneur, businesswoman, and person in the world? What if you – having fun with everything that you do – was one of the greatest ways to empower your family and grow your business? When you are relaxed, the world around you is more likely to be relaxed. When you are happy, you give the world around you permission to be happy, too.
What if success in your business could lead to success with your family, and ease with your family could lead to greater ease with your business, as well? Are you willing to be a leader in your own life, and have the courage to put in place things that actually work for you – and get you closer to where you would like to be going?
What if you didn’t have to create your family and your business the way that everybody else says is ‘good’ – but rather, based on what will truly make your life fun, productive, and easeful? Are you willing to be a different mom & entrepreneur?
