How a Supporting Cast Can Get You Through the Tough Times

Can I Get a Little Support Here?

We are at the midway point of the year. It has been another year with challenges amidst the pandemic and the economic fallout that has occurred as a result.

I live in Toronto, Canada and have been in a lockdown since November 2020. A month or so ago, our Provincial government imposed “Stay at home orders.” That has affected my training and consulting business to the point where I have not had a new booking since, and one gig I had got postponed! It has also really taken a toll on our small business community here in Toronto, in general.

Where do you go, when the going gets challenging? I go into a state of fear: I begin to not trust and have faith. But I surround myself with people that can prop me up. They remind me of who I am, and that God has my back.

Yes, I said the “G” word. I feel strongly that we need to rely on God in our business and get quiet as we begin our days to ask for insight and direction for the day. You might be surprised by the advice you get. It is usually helpful. The key is to take time out of your day to be quiet, pray, and watch what messages you get.

Now, I get this is not for everyone. But what I also recommend is that you surround yourself with good people that will pick you up if you are struggling, doubting, and in fear. Let me share a true story.

My Story

When I was 10, I lost my dad. The ideology that I took on was that life did not support me. I was different — the only kid at school without a dad — and I had family that didn’t know how to connect with a 10-year-old boy, because they were dealing with their own pain after this sudden loss of a dad and husband.

This ideology that I created has hampered me sporadically throughout my career. When the going gets tough, I resort to that belief — one a hurt 10-year-old boy adopted. I do work (therapy, meditation, affirmations) to let it go, and I make a strong effort to replace that ideology.

So, here I am a 10-year-old boy, trying to make sense of life. I struggled with feelings of being unlovable and sadness. Fast forward two years later: A miracle happened, one that taught me a lifelong lesson. Even though, I felt alone, and some people in my life didn’t show up in a way I may have hoped for back then, what did happen was a miracle of support.

My sister (who is older than me) was dating a guy whose friend was an Ottawa Rough Rider. I was born and raised in Ottawa (Canada’s Capital), and the Rough Riders were a pro football team. We have the CFL in Canada, and you have the NFL in the United States.

At 12 years old, I got introduced to a player on the team, who was from Texas but came to Canada to play football. His name was Rhome Nixon. He was a Tight End on the offense, and he took me under his wing. Here is a lonely, sensitive 12-year-old boy who gets to meet a pro football player on his favorite team! My friendship with Rhome Nixon lasted for over three years, before he got traded to the B.C. Lions team.

This kind man would let me watch team practices, hang out in the dressing room, meet the other players, watch the CFL All Star game on the sidelines and another game on the sidelines, too. I would attend practices often, and one day after a game, I got invited to Mr. Nixon’s apartment with some of the other players for an after-game social event. I got to hang out with players like Art Green (who played in the NFL), Art Laster, Rudy Sims, and a now Hall of Fame Quarterback, Condredge Holloway. I was 15 years old at this point, and this was an amazing miracle. I even got a ride home from Condredge, which was absolutely amazing.

My Lesson from This Miracle

Some people in your life might not show up in a time of need, fear, worry, or doubt. But remember, do not focus on them; focus on who is on your team. Whether it’s one person or several, be grateful for them, invest in them, and let go of those that don’t show up. Invest in and give thanks for the good people, and let go of those that might disappoint you.

As I close this month’s article, I really want to encourage you to be mindful of getting a supporting cast around you — to help you through the days when your business becomes a bit too much.

Three Things to Investigate

Here are 3 things I want you to investigate this month, or now — today, even:

1. Form a mastermind team: a group of other entrepreneurs who can support one another, with ideas, contacts, strategies, and encouragement. You can learn more about forming a mastermind team by reading Jack Canfield’s book, titled “64 Success Principals” or Napoleon Hill’s book, titled “Think and Grow Rich.”

2. Get an accountability partner: for areas in life or business you want to see an improvement in. If it is about diet or exercise, find someone who can guide you; however, it is a reciprocal relationship, so you must share your support with a partner.

3. Get a coach or therapist. In these times, it is okay not to be okay. It is not a sign of weakness to get professional help — it is a smart move!

As we are halfway through this year, let us finish stronger, healthier, smarter, wiser, and thriving!