When you’re living and working from home with your partner, it can be challenging to maintain a healthy balance between professional and personal time. In addition to being together all the time, different work styles and needs can potentially become a source of conflict. So, how can you ensure a thriving relationship and a healthy work-from-home experience? Below are helpful tips for all home-based business owners.
What advice can you give to couples who work at home together?
First, it is pertinent to create boundaries and give each other space. We all work and respond to distractions differently. For example, you might be at a spot in the day where you can take a break, so you start chatting with your partner about a great blog post you read. However, they might be in the middle of a project that is on a deadline. You need to give your partner the same courtesy you’d give to an office worker.
Setting up guidelines is super helpful and can prevent feelings from getting hurt. We generally don’t chat during the day unless we’re collaborating on something in particular (which does happen a lot). We prefer to break at noon and prepare lunch together and check in with each other about our day.
How often do you work from your home office together?
We quickly learned that it was best if we worked in separate rooms during the workday. After our second son went off to college, we thought it was a great time to convert a spare bedroom into an office to share. We had cabinets and desks installed, making it the perfect spot for two people to work together. However, we quickly realized it was the ideal spot for two people that did the same thing, but not for us.
Mike is on the phone most of the day while I work on design and promotion. Mike needs a speakerphone, and I need mellow music and calm. Mike is up and down, running around, while I am deep in Photoshop or creating videos and need to be free of distractions. You can see where this is going! Sharing an office during times like this coronavirus pandemic would be super challenging, especially since we’re both on so many Zoom calls each day.
What are the challenges of working together in the home?
The challenges are definitely real, and working together from home is not for everyone. There is the fact that you’re in the house all day, which can be challenging depending on your job. For me, I’m writing and creating all day. Uninterrupted, I could go for days without looking up! We artsy people tend to turn inward and be self-contained. On the other hand, Mike needs lots of interaction, so we make an effort to strike that balance. He is all about the schedule (noon is a HARD STOP for lunch), and I tend to just freeform my day. So I am careful to make sure I’m ready to go at noon, regardless of what I’m doing.
How can couples navigate between their work and personal lives when everything happens in the home?
Great question! Finding interesting conversation pieces and new topics to discuss is a challenge when you’re together 24/7. That said, it is vital to find a few items apart to bring to the table. I love watching TED talks, so I’ll share the highlights. Mike is all about his long walks (alone) and how far he went and what he saw, so he shares these with me.
Practice random acts of kindness. Make your partner breakfast, pick up a coffee to go, or leave them a small note in the morning. Always allocate an hour to your partner after the workday ends. Take time to disconnect without phones or distractions and spend quality time with your loved one. Prior to the pandemic, we both looked forward to heading out to dinner at the end of the day, but now we make due at home.
Plan special evenings with your partner, where you try something new that you haven’t done together during this time. We had been putting together a great happy hour list — challenging each other to find the best one. Now we’re spending more time playing games (we’re obsessed with the card game Golf), doing home improvements, and calling our loved ones more. We’re also trying new recipes and sharing more in the meal prep. We also put together a great blog post, 40 Creative Date Nights While You Shelter in Place.
What’s the best thing about working together? What’s the best thing about being able to work at home?
Wearing yoga pants all day, every day, is a great perk, but working together has also kept us very connected. Even though I generally like to work without distractions, it’s comforting when I hear Mike in the other room. Not sharing an office doesn’t mean you’re not sharing the connection! We are constantly on IM, and people always say, “Aren’t you two right there together?” Yes, we are, but we’ve both learned what the other person needs to keep their sanity, keep their work rolling forward, and keep a great marriage going!
