Running a home-based business with your spouse can be both wonderful and stressful. But couple this with operating your business out of your home, and working with your spouse in the same space where you live presents a rather unique set of challenges.
When Justin and I started Smiling Tree Toys in 2010, we had no idea it would grow from a humble home-based wooden toy shop into a 7-figure business. What began as a small side project creating keepsake wooden toys in an old red barn on the Minnesota prairie has since evolved into a full-time business that supports our family, our small team, and now includes our sustainable corporate gift line, Smiling Tree Gifts.
Studies have shown that it’s “not only your own personality that influences the experiences that lead to greater occupational success, but that your spouse’s personality matters too.” After fifteen years of working alongside my husband, I would concur! Now over a decade into this adventure of entrepreneurship with my spouse, I’ve found a few factors to be crucial for balancing business and marriage in our lives, especially when it all happens in the same place. It’s been one wild ride, full of lessons learned along the way. Here are some of the most important things we’ve done to keep our marriage strong while scaling a home-based business from the ground up.
1. Define Your Roles—and Stick to Them
One of the biggest challenges when you’re starting out is figuring out who does what. In the early days, Justin and I both wore all the hats. From product design to production to marketing and photography, to customer service, packing, and shipping, it was just us. We’d spend hours working side-by-side finalizing lumber purchase details, crafting marketing copy, selecting product photos, and writing customer service emails. It was a lot (see our humorous take on this!); our hat racks were full (and not very stable). As the business grew, it quickly became clear that we needed defined roles.
We sat down and identified one another’s strengths and (gently) pointed out our weaknesses. We chose what felt natural to us; Justin took charge of woodshop operations, while I focused on fulfillment, marketing and customer service. Once we defined our roles, it allowed us to focus, be more efficient, and avoid stepping on each other’s toes. Of course we continued to work closely together on the high level things (goal setting, product line development, and long term vision), but we quickly found the day-to-day operations best handled when done so separately.
Tip: Stick to your roles. Wear only your hats! It’s easy to jump in and try to help the other when you see them struggling or think you have a better way, but that can blur the lines and create unnecessary tension. Let your spouse shine in their zone of genius, and be there to support and assist, but only if they ask.
2. Create Physical Separation Between Work and Home
When your home-based business operates out of the same place you live, it’s hard to draw a line between “work time” and “home time.” This was a struggle for us, especially in the beginning. Our laser engraver shared a space right off the living room. The baby’s changing table doubled as a countertop for packing orders. We’d be playing with the kids on the living room floor in the evenings, but finding it hard to ignore the shipping supplies tucked in the corner.
We quickly realized that if we didn’t create at least some physical separation between the business and our home life, we’d never not be working. Burn out was seeming inevitable. So we managed to carve out a (very small) space in our home just for work. When we were in that space, it was work time. When we left, it was family time. Creating physical boundaries helped maintain some sense of normalcy and definition between our business and home life roles.
Tip: If you can, designate a specific room or area of your home for the business. If you’re tight on space, even a corner of a room with a divider can work. If you don’t even have space to divide, try tidying up at the end of each work day. Getting work stuff out of sight is ideal, but if that’s not possible at least work to keep it contained to one area. What matters most is that you create some type of visual, physical division between work and home.
3. Weekly Check-Ins to Stay on the Same Page
Running a home-based business together requires constant communication. It’s so easy for misunderstandings to crop up or for one of you to feel like you’re carrying more weight than the other. That’s why weekly check-ins have been so helpful for us.
Every week, Justin and I sit down for 30-60 minutes to touch base about what’s happening in the business. We talk about wins, challenges, and anything that might be weighing on our minds. It’s an opportunity to air concerns before they build up and become bigger issues. These check-ins help us make sure projects are moving forward and that we’re aligned on both short-term tasks and long-term goals.
Tip: Keep these meetings structured but flexible. Choose a comfortable space. Throw in some hot coffee and rolls in the morning, or midday snacks and a fizzy drink in the afternoon. It’s not about creating more stress; it’s about keeping communication open and staying on the same page.
4. Monthly Dates—No Business Talk Allowed!
When you work with your spouse, it’s easy to unknowingly talk about business all the time. Justin and I both truly love what we do so much, that it personally lights us up to always be dreaming and setting goals for our business. This can make it really hard not to have work on our brains during all our waking hours. But we still very intentionally create “non-work zones” in our relationship. One easy way to ensure this happens is with monthly date nights.
These dates are for us as a couple, not business partners. We might talk about current events, hobbies we’re pursuing, kids, or plans for the next family trip—anything but work. It’s important to remember why you started this journey together in the first place: because you love and respect each other. Not because you were in need of a business partner!
Tip: Whether it’s dinner out, a walk in nature, or an evening on the couch together after the kids are in bed, schedule regular time for just the two of you where the only goal is to enjoy each other’s company.
5. Yearly Retreats to Dream Big and Plan
While monthly dates are for reconnecting, our yearly retreats are for dreaming big. Try to get away once a year—just the two of you—for a weekend to reflect on the past year and plan for the future of the business and how that will support and further your dreams as individuals and a family.
Justin and I look forward to this every year. We talk about what’s working, what needs to change, and what our goals are for the coming year. We keep things high level and ensure the end result is a clear vision of where we want to be one to three years from now along with a short list of the big things that’ll ensure we get there. Our personal dreams for our family inevitably work their way into these conversations, as they should. While we love our work and the purpose it brings us, the business ultimately needs to support our desired lifestyle and personal ambitions. That’s what keeps us both excited and motivated.
Tip: It doesn’t have to be an expensive getaway. The important thing is getting out of your usual environment (leave your house, even if just for the day), so you can focus without distractions. This is your time together to dream, set big goals, plan, and get excited!
6. Grow Slowly and Intentionally
When we started Smiling Tree, we had big dreams—but we also both wanted to grow at a pace that felt manageable. It’s easy to get caught up in the excitement and want to expand quickly, but that can lead to burnout, resentment, and financial stress.
Justin and I sat down early on and agreed on how much of our personal savings we were willing to invest in the business and whether we should borrow for growth. We also had long conversations about being intentional with our time, weighing the pros and cons of time with our kids when they were young and not yet in school vs time spent in and on the business. We ultimately decided to grow slowly and sustainably. For us, this meant prioritizing time with our then-young children over full-time work in our home-based business and reinvesting profits instead of taking on debt.
Could we have grown faster and been more profitable more quickly? Perhaps. But that would have meant fewer days spent crafting, reading, and playing with our kids. And probably more nights spent worrying about paying back our loans and watching our bottom line. I can say with certainty that growing slowly was right for us.
Tip: Talk openly with your spouse about your risk tolerance, financial goals, and your desired family time. Growing slowly doesn’t mean not dreaming big—it just means being strategic about how and when you scale.
7. Stay Flexible and Adapt
One of the best pieces of advice I can give is to stay flexible. Things will change—your roles, your home-based business model, your family’s needs. When we started, we were focused solely on wooden toys, but as the business grew, we saw an opportunity to create corporate gifts that aligned with our values of sustainability and craftsmanship. This came about at a time when our youngest was starting Kindergarten, which allowed both of us to focus solely on our business during the school hours.
Adapting to new opportunities has allowed us to scale in ways we hadn’t originally envisioned. Be open to change and trust that you and your spouse can figure things out as they come.
Tip: Set aside time to reflect on what’s working and what’s not. Consider how your personal life situation plays into what is or isn’t possible within your business right now. This will help you stay adaptable, pivot when needed, and ensure your business and home life mesh well together.
8. (Try to) Separate Emotions from Business Decisions
This is a tough one. When you’re both so deeply invested in the business (and each other), it’s easy to let emotions drive decisions. But making choices based on feelings rather than facts can lead to unnecessary conflicts, stress, and (speaking from experience) poor business decisions.
Justin and I have learned over the years to approach business decisions as objectively as we can. We take time to gather data, consider all the options, and make decisions that are best for the business and our family, even if they’re not the easiest emotionally.
Tip: Develop a process for decision-making that includes gathering data and talking through options calmly. This can help take the emotion out of high-stakes business choices.
9. Celebrate Every Milestone—Big and Small
Finally, don’t forget to celebrate! Building a home-based business with your spouse is hard work, and it’s easy to get so focused on the next goal that you forget to acknowledge how far you’ve come. Take time to celebrate each win, whether it’s landing a new client, reaching a revenue milestone, or simply surviving a particularly challenging week.
Celebrating together reminds you of why you’re doing this together and reinforces that you’re a team, in both life and business.
Tip: Don’t wait for the “big” milestones to celebrate. Even the small wins deserve recognition!
Running a business with your spouse is an adventure like no other. It requires trust, communication, and a whole lot of patience, but it’s also incredibly rewarding. It’s also very doable; we’re certainly not the only husband-wife team making a living together.
Justin and I have learned so much throughout our journey. There have and will continue to be tough days when the business problems feel especially daunting, the house is a mess, the kids need rides to all the things, and we’re both feeling the strain of it all. But all-in-all, we wouldn’t trade this for the world. I hope these tips help you as you embark on your own marriage and entrepreneurial journeys!
